In my quest for an accurate account of this whole journey, I cannot omit the last 7 days prior to the comp. I cutely nicknamed it "Hell Week". It was anything but cute.
On Saturday, Sunday & Monday, I consumed the aforementioned Chicken & Lettuce, with approximately 10 litres of water each day. The hours dragged by endlessly, including those spent completing the 2hr cardio and 1hr weights sessions. I would disappear to the bedroom at about 6pm each night because I simply could not cope with the smells and sights of 'real' food.
To describe myself as cranky would be a gross understatement. Enough said.
The light headedness, the overwhelming sense of tiredness, the heavy, aching muscles and feeling of immense hunger, just about tipped me over the edge. The only light at the end of this tunnel was the promise of sweet potato on Tuesday night, followed by 4 rice cakes and lashings of sweet honey post-final-workout. I hung off that thought through every hungry hour leading up to Tuesday. If I never felt that way again in my life, it would be too soon.
So Tuesday evening came and, as per my instructions, I tucked into 100g of sweet potato with my chicken & lettuce. I then planned to complete a late workout followed by the sweet honey rice cakes. Absolute bliss!!!! Well, that's what I thought. However, due to a lapse in concentration, I didn't follow the program. The instructions were to; a) workout, b) consume honey and rice cakes, c) have sweet potato with dinner...IN THAT PRECISE ORDER!!!
Oh crap!! On realising what I had done wrong, instead of a nice upper body workout followed by 'dessert', I was told to get on the treadmill and complete another 1.5hrs of cardio, sleep, complete another 1.5hrs of cardio in the morning, followed by a workout and then, and only then, was I to have the coveted honey cakes.
On hearing this news I threw my first training-tantrum, burst into tears and dissolved into a sobbing mess. My children were immensely concerned and I felt terrible for worrying them. But I was powerless to stop the tears. They were formed out of full self pity that turned to anger and my eyes burned and blazed for the whole 1.5 hours I'm embarrassed to say. The following morning I hauled my sorry butt out of bed and walked another 1.5hrs before collapsing. I then completed a fairly gruelling 7-round, 15-rep circuit of all upper body exercises.
Following this torture, I sat at the kitchen table and consumed what I can only describe as PARADISE ON A RICE CAKE!!!! I not only devoured the 4 I was allowed, I also licked the plate clean!!
From there, the world seemed like a better place and I could suddenly think straight again. Throughout Weds, Thurs & Fri, I sent Sammy a series of pictures both morning and night, and, according to how filled-out my muscles looked, she would decide whether I could add more carbs or not. So the next few days I had a mixture of lettuce, chicken, oats & sweet potato. How could such simple things taste so ridiculously good!!!
On Wednesday night the tanning started. Consisting of 4 base coats being left on 12 hours each, with the last remaining on for comp day. Can I tell you that, should you take up bodybuilding, you will need to enlist the help of a very, very special friend for the tanning process!! To describe it as personal doesn't really do it justice. It's.....very personal!! Thank god for my Rob!!
Thursday I finally had the orders to stop all cardio, all weights and begin to 'relax'. While that sounds like bliss, three children means that it doesn't work out quite as planned but the feeling of not having to exercise was heaven in itself. It's been 9 solid months of workout after workout after workout, and a guilt-free few days off was amazing.
On Friday I had a few jobs to complete including the application of nails. While there, I again read instructions wrong and thought I had to eat a nut bar. Apparently that was meant for comp day but, in my haste to obey orders, I had my fingernails being worked on while I ordered my son to break off clumps of the bar and stuff them into my mouth. The asian lady doing my nails was staring at me in some sort of disbelief. Both hands in front of her while Tyler is jamming chunks of nut bar into my mouth. After bar #2 I made the decision to recheck instrutions. I knew it had to be too good to be true!! I had stuffed up again. But I didn't beat myself up about the second big mistake - instead I just revelled in the macadamia & cranberry sweet taste of that stuff - YUM!!!!
Friday night saw the last of the base tans being applied. I tried to get an early night but found that midnight was about the time we hit the hay. Unsure how that happened.
And then comp day arrived. I woke at the magical hour of 4.45am and gave in to reading a magazine from about 5.30.
And then the fun began!!! But that's another story. TO BE CONTINUED......
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